Me-Time: Managing Stress and Finding Work-Life Balance

Me-Time: Managing Stress and Finding Work-Life Balance

Work-life balance is an individual measurement and may vary daily, monthly, and over extended periods of time. The right balance will differ as your lifestyle changes. Your needs and wants evolve throughout the various stages of life, from single life, to being married, to the possible addition of children or new career aspirations, and to nearing retirement. There is no perfect formula or ideal balance. The right equation differs because each individual has different priorities, goals and influences that shape our needs at home and at work.

A common and perhaps familiar narrative unfolds across the country week to week. Your work colleagues arrive early, stay late, they’re on the way to successful careers, or so it seems. To keep up, you do the same. You perform and extend your working day without notice of the cumulative toll being placed on you and your surroundings. Out of gas and out of time, you realize the impact on family, work, and yourself. If you feel you need a 36-hour day to do it all, then you might need to make better use of your day. In fact, it might be you need to integrate more hours of the kind at the end of your daily to-do list. Hours of Me-time.

When social worker Carroll Wilson welcomes an overworked, overstressed, overwhelmed patient at her office, she often shares one of her key metaphors: “On a plane, you’re instructed to put on your oxygen mask first, because if you don’t, you’ll run out of oxygen and won’t be able to help others around put on theirs. So it is with time management in the context of self-care”, she says. “Not giving oneself quality time is like running on empty. Ultimately, everyone needs Me-time.”

In this article, we’ll be looking at:

• why we need time for ourselves and what the cost is if we don’t find it;

• how to get additional free time for ourselves;

• time-management tips;

• environmental tips; and

• psychological tips.

Why do we need Me-time?

Without quality personal time, not only will you run out of energy, slow down and be less productive, but soon you’ll find yourself underachieving in every life department, personal and professional, and your anxiety may increase exponentially. Myths around human invincibility are hard to debunk. Perceived superwomen and supermen are still valued role models. But for most if not all, the model is unsustainable. Several studies have shown that working long hours for extended periods of time have led to occurrences of physical and mental ailments including cardiovascular disease, anxiety and depression.(1) As a result, fatigue, absenteeism, lower productivity and organizational turnover rates tend to increase. According to Statistics Canada, a lack of work-life balance cost Canadian businesses a combined 20 billion dollars a year in health claims, lost productivity and absenteeism.(2)

Are you at risk of job burnout?

You may be more likely to experience job burnout if:

  • you identify so strongly with work that you lack a reasonable balance between your work-life and your personal life;
  • you try to be everything to everyone;
  • you work in a helping profession, such as health care, counselling or teaching;
  • you feel you have little or no control over your work; and/or
  • you feel that some aspects of your job have become monotonous.

A national study on balancing work and care-giving in Canada reported one quarter of the population works 50 hours or more per week, a rise of 50% as compared to a decade prior. One third of Canadians feel they have more work to accomplish than time allows. That figure rises to 40% when family roles are taken into consideration. More than half of the survey’s respondents took work home with them, putting in an average of seven extra hours a week from home. Nearly two thirds spent more than an hour a day catching up on e-mails and one third spent more than an hour emailing on their days off.(3)

Preventing burnout:

Obviously when what you’re doing is no longer fueling your passion and/or commitment to your career, it’s time to seriously assess your situation. Evaluate how you can change your current situation to re-ignite your enthusiasm.

  • Discuss your options with your supervisor and HR. What are the options for professional development within your company? Is there a way to explore careers in other departments? Perhaps your supervisor can help in giving you new challenges or changing expectations?
  • What gives you joy outside the workplace? If you love to sing or play an instrument, join a choir or band. Pursue your interests by taking courses, getting involved in the community and meeting people with similar interests.
  • Volunteer. Helping others is a great way to get a better perspective on life. There are many ways to have your talents, interests and experience make a big difference in the lives of others.
  • Make a bucket list. Having and pursuing personal goals, no matter how trivial they may seem, can reignite your enthusiasm and that can spill over into all areas of your life.
  • Seek support. If you think you may be experiencing symptoms of poor work-life balance including but not limited to trouble concentrating, irritability, weakened coping skills, headaches and muscle stiffness, don’t ignore these potential warning signs. See your family doctor to rule out any underlying physical issues. Reach out to friends, loved ones or co-workers.

What about those days off? Only about one third of Canadians use their earned vacation days, and of those vacationers, 28% of them took less than one half of their allotted time?(4)

Learn to combat those assumed pressures, because, in the end, it’s also work that suffers. It has been proven that getting personal quality time and achieving work-life equilibrium reboots the brain, increases concentration, improves creativity allowing outside the box problem solving, and ultimately helps us to feel more engaged at work. Moreover, personal time is very effective for stress management, and provides room for reflection and self-growth, contributing to better relationships.(5)

How to get additional free time for ourselves

If you experience prolonged periods of time without work-life balance, it may have adverse effects on your mental and physical health. Several studies have shown that working long hours for extended periods of time have led to occurrences of physical and mental ailments including but not limited to fatigue and stress.

The good news is that you don’t have to find hours of daily Me-time to reap the benefits. Analysis showed that those who experienced high quality, rather than the most Me-time enjoyed better work-life balance, well-being and were more engaged at work.(6)

Time-management tips

  • Wake up 30 minutes before the rest of your household to exercise, meditate or do something you enjoy.
  • Make weekly or monthly dates with yourself: cinema night, driving golf balls, a couple of hours at the spa, etc.
  • This one is not easy. Track, prioritize and respect your personal time as if it were on par with the importance you give to time allotted to work or devoted to family and people close to you.

Environmental tips

  • Allow yourself to avoid the physical ‘to-do checklist’ environments of your life (home office, kitchen, shed, etc.). You don’t have to travel far away or wait for a special occasion. Seek outdoor activities, contemplate beautiful scenery nearby and breathe some fresh air.
  • Ditch technology! At least disconnect from email, social media, chat rooms, work-related communications and stressful news.
  • Delimit and protect your time and space.

On the topic of clearer boundaries, communicate your need for alone time to people around you. It is okay to go for a walk and to eat alone in a park close to the workplace, even if it means breaking the habit of the usual cafeteria/café gathering with colleagues. It is okay to have a room to yourself at home with a closed door, and without interruptions when you find time to read or pursue your hobby.

Psychological tips

Of course, the first person to negotiate with and convince is…yourself!

  • Learn to say yes to yourself and no to others.
  • Remove guilt! It helps to remember that taking care of yourself through some Me-time will increase your energy, availability and patience when you come back to either the workplace or family. It enables you to be the best partner, parent and colleague you can be.
  • Get rid of perfectionism! When you spend time on something you have to do but is not very important, go for good enough instead of seeking perfection.It will afford you time for things that matter to you.

It might also be useful to use some re-framing techniques to improve one’s perception of quality time. For example, Me-time doesn’t have to always mean alone-time. One study found that Me-time can attain the same benefits to yourself if it includes freely chosen activities involving people you love.(6) For a parent, it might mean to re-frame a common statement such as “I have to spend time with my kids” and turn it into “I get to play with my kids”. Some caretaking and nurturing activities like cooking, for example, can thus switch from ‘’task’’ to ‘’hobby” status in no time.

Achieving work-life balance takes effort. It is important to practice work-life balance regularly to keep yourself on track with what is important in your life at that moment. With continued practice, you can create a roadmap to a life with less stress and more focus on what’s important to you.

References:

  1. Editorial. “Another view: Worked to death.” TheRecord.com, TheRecord.com, 2 Nov. 2015, www.therecord.com/opinion-story/6077710-another-vi…
  2. Canada, E. A. (2017, February 16). Psychological Health in the Workplace. Source: https://www.canada.ca/en/employment-social-develop…
  3. O’Kane, Josh. “Canada’s work-Life balance more off-Kilter than ever.” The Globe and Mail, 26 Mar. 2017 (The article refers to a 2012 National Study on Balancing Work and Caregiving in Canada). Source: http://beta.theglobeandmail.com/report-on-business…
  4. Results of an APD Canada Study as cited in Jackman-Atkinson, K. (2018). It’s About Time: Canadians Not Taking Advantage of Full Paid Vacation. Neepawa Banner & Press. Retrieved on April 2, 2019 from https://www.chrisd.ca/2018/05/21/ vacation-time-canada-workers/#.XKQQGy3MylN
  5. Why ‘’me’’ time matters when it comes to your happiness. Source: https://my.happify. com/hd/why-me-time-is-important-for-happiness-infographic/
  6. British Psychological Society (BPS). “Good quality me-time vital for home and work well-being.” ScienceDaily. ScienceDaily, 7 January 2015. Source: www.sciencedaily. com/releases/2015/01/15010720455…

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PTSD in the Workplace: Solutions and Support

PTSD in the Workplace: Solutions and Support

Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is most often linked to combat occupations and first responders. So you wouldn’t think of your everyday co-workers as prime candidates to encounter PTSD related symptoms.In most instances, our co-workers have always lived an ocean away, and then some, from an armed conflict. As day to day employees, we may never witness a crime scene or a deadly car crash.

So what could or does happen?

Although research has mainly focused on combat, rape and other types of assaultive violence as causes of PTSD, the sudden, unexpected death of someone you care about is often a leading cause of PTSD within the community, accounting for nearly one third of all PTSD cases.(1) So yes, there is more to each of us as employees than meets the eye. Maybe someone has lost their
mother, their best friend, or their partner / spouse. Or maybe it’s something else they have lost, such as a work and/or occupation related event. Trauma can manifest and surface in very different ways. The mind can become a conflict zone. How can one escape? In this article, we’ll be looking at:

  • What is PTSD and what are its symptoms and signs?
  • What are the occupational effects of PTSD?
  • What solutions and supports have proven most effective?

To help shed some light on those issues, we’ve asked the expert advice of Dr. Sandra Primiano, a psychologist who serves as Homewood Health’s Senior Director for the Homewood Clinics.

Redefining trauma

In terms of high-risk occupations, we immediately think of the military and first responders such as police, firefighters and paramedics. But, even if less frequent, many public facing positions are vulnerable to potential trauma. Assaults are not uncommon for occupations such as retail or bank clerks and taxi drivers, for example, PTSD occurs in response to the direct experience of extremely traumatic/stressful events or being witness to people involved in them. The very concept of traumahas expanded drastically since being first introduced in the DSM-III in 1980. To meet the criteria, people no longer need to be survivors of life- threatening events or even be present on the scene. The clerk who hears about a colleague being held at gunpoint on the night shift can qualify as a trauma survivor just as much as the victim whose life was at risk.(2) Vastly more people qualify for the PTSD diagnosis than in the past.(3)

For example, 60% of participants in a study on causes of PTSD in the Detroit community experienced the sudden death of someone they cared about. More than 14% of the participants developed PTSD. The conditional risk of PTSD following exposure to trauma, independently from the source, was 9.2%. In comparison, the highest risk of PTSD prevalence resulted from a person being physically assaulted (20.9%).(1)

PTSD is to mental illness what concussion is to physical health

The vast majority of people subjected to trauma will not develop PTSD. Depending on sources, it can be said that between three and five percent of the population is affected by PTSD, and approximately nine percent of people will be diagnosed with PTSD in their lifetime. Women are significantly more at risk of developing the disorder than men, by a two-to-one ratio.(4)

“What makes people more vulnerable than others? We know that one factor is having a childhood with a history of adversive experiences, like abuse (psychological, physical or neglect)”, says Dr. Primiano, whose area of expertise is trauma and stress-related disorders and anxiety disorders. “When you exercise, you feel pain at first but your body gets stronger, with PTSD it’s the reverse. The more trauma you experience, the more vulnerable you become. The more you’ve experienced, the more susceptible you are to experience even more, as you’ve been primed to experience the world in certain ways, and then it accumulates. When you experience early trauma, you become more vulnerable towards developing trauma,stress and anxiety related disorders as you are pre-conditioned to similar triggers or traumatic events.”

PTSD is a mental illness that needs the fulfillment of certain criteria for a minimum duration of one month before being diagnosed. It is not associated only with feelings of sadness, anxiety or shock after the traumatic events.

The list of symptoms fall under four categories:

  • Intrusive memories: Can include recurring, unwanted, distressing memories of traumatic events. “The person is reliving the trauma event like it’s happening right now through flashbacks or nightmares. There can also be emotional or physical distress reactions when something triggers the recollection of the events.”
  • Avoidance: One tries not to think about the events by avoiding certain places, persons or activities that bring the traumatic event to mind. “Some will also forget really important parts of the events.”
  • Hyperarousal: It involves being on guard, feeling angry, irritable, aggressive and impulsive. “It can lead to self- destructive behaviours, trouble to concentrate or being easily startled.”
  • Negative thoughts and moods: Self-blame, fear, guilt and distorted negative feelings about oneself, others and the world. “People will also tell you they don’t feel anything anymore or that they’re hopeless about the future. Some can socially withdraw and lose interest. It becomes hard to connect with people.”

The disorder can develop immediately after experiencing or witnessing the event, or surge months, and in some cases even years, after the event.

Occupational effects of PTSD

When PTSD develops, it can become very difficult for employees to engage in work. “Getting to or being at the workplace for the employee could be a trigger, says Dr. Primiano. It becomes too disturbing, stressing. Employees may call in sick often, or just not show up and no one knows why.” In situations where an employee manages to make it into work, she says, co-workers maybe witness to occupational effects, such as:

  • Having trouble concentrating or remembering things they’re supposed to be doing because they’re anxious and hyper-aroused.
  • Taking more time to complete tasks than before. Managing time and scheduling can be an issue.
  • Looking very tired. PTSD often comes with certain sleep-related issues, such as insomnia, because of nightmares and hyper vigilance.
  • Coming to work under the influence, as nearly half of individuals with PTSD use substance abuse as a coping mechanism and more than one-in-five also meet criteria for substance addiction.(5)
  • Having angry outbursts because they’re on edge and are easily startled, which can cause the amicable co-worker you knew to easily get into arguments.
  • Having increased difficulty coping with stress.

When the red flag behaviours listed above manage to somehow stay under the radar, they most often come with a decrease in performance that, in many cases, will be noticed.

Solutions and support

What kind of help?

Talking about how you’re feeling simply might not be enough. Depending upon the severity of the disorder, Dr. Primiano advises to seek evidence-based psychotherapy for PTSD, essentially meaning any therapy that uses cognitive, emotional, or behavioral techniques to facilitate processing a traumatic experience and in which the trauma focus is a central component of the therapy.(6)

“The reality is, some employees get better on their own with the passage of time, while other employees will not. It can be very difficult to return to your previous level of functioning, more so than with depressive episodes or having panic disorder, because PTSD really does change the perception of one’s self, of the world, and of others including your co-workers.”

Dr. Primiano, adds that the prognosis is more complex for employees who have experienced many traumatic events and/or have suffered from PTSD for a long time. “It changes things about who you are, the way you think and interpret things. It’s really hard to change that.”

But trauma-focused (TF) psychotherapies do work. TF therapies are almost three times as effective as medication in treating the severity of PTSD.(7) For every 100 individuals with PTSD, only nine percent will no longer have the disorder after three months without treatment but this figure rises to anywhere from 42% to 53% with TF treatment depending on the approach.(8)

She concludes by saying that, with proper care, one can really hope to return to a good level of functioning. Sometimes talking to a professional can help you regain a healthy perspective regarding your ability to cope with the aftermath of the traumatic event you have experienced.

References:

  1. Bresleau N, Kessler RC et al Trauma and posttraumatic stress disorder in the community:The Detroit Area Survey of Trauma. Arch.Gen.Psychiatry.1998;55(7);626-32. Link to abstract https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/9672053#
  2. (McNally, 2009; McNally & Breslau, 2008).
  3. (Breslau & Kessler, 2001).
  4. American Psychiatric Association’s website. Link: https://www.psychiatry.org/ patients-families/ptsd/what-is-ptsd
  5. Pietrzak RH, Goldstein RB, Southwick SM, Grant BF. Prevalence and Axis I comorbidity of full and partial posttraumatic stress disorder in the United States: Results from Wave 2 of the National Epidemiologic Survey on Alcohol and Related Conditions. Journal of Anxiety Disorders. 2011;25:456–465. doi:10.1016/j.janxdis.2010.11.010.
  6. Jessica Hamblen. The 2017 Revised Clinical Practice Guideline for PTSD: Recommendations for Psychotherapy. National Center of PTSD, U.S.Department for Veterans Affairs.
  7. Watts BV, Schnurr PP et al (2013). Meta-analysis of the efficacy of treatment for post-traumatic stress disorder. Journal of Clinical Psychiatry, 74(6), e551-e557. Link: http://dx.doi.org/10.4088/JCP.12r08225
  8. Harik JM, Hamblen JL, Grubbs K. G. & Schnurr PP. Will it work for me? A meta-analysis of loss of PTSD diagnosis after evidence-based treatment.

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