Lifestyle Archives - Page 3 of 3 - Homewood Ravensview

Teaching Inclusivity and Inclusive Language

Think of a time when someone conveyed a message to you that you didn’t belong. The rejection may have been deliberate or incidental. The experience might have happened a long time ago or been only moments old. Suppose you were asked to recall how you felt. In that case, your description might include emotional references to hurt feelings, being crushed, or even feeling heartbroken. These expressions tend to use language that focuses on physical pain to talk about social rejection and with good reason. Researchers have found that being excluded activates our pain system. Neurologically we’re hardwired to use the same neural pathways for physical and social pain.¹

To feel terrific, we must connect with others through social interactions that are welcoming. We all have the need to feel wholly accepted as individuals. We also need to know that we have equal footing with others, despite our differences. These are some of the broad fundamentals of inclusivity. It’s a way of interacting with people who have typically been marginalized to be supportive. It’s also what we’re focusing on this month.

What does it mean to belong?

We respond to the people and situations around us with a complex combination of emotions, intellect, instincts, and intuitiveness, but that’s not all. We build on this information with learned social behaviours and cultural influences.
It’s how we learn to live our lives both independently and interdependently. Studies show that our social environment profoundly shapes us. We tend to suffer when our social bonds are threatened or severed.²

Nearly everyone has experienced feelings of wanting to be included, of wanting to belong. If you don’t think it’s true,
what you can do is reflect on when you were younger and in school, specifically your gym class. Can you feel the nervousness that crept over you while you stood in a line across from people who were assigned the task of picking a team? Even if you were the athletic type, you can probably think of at least one time in your life when you worried that you wouldn’t be selected by the team you were hoping to join. For many, it was far worse. Some were afraid that they weren’t going to be picked at all. To be the last person meant that you were joining a team that had to take you by default rather than by choice. This nightmarish scenario has played out time and again for many people growing up. It was like a very public affirmation of whether you belonged or you were to be excluded. It hurt if it was the latter, and that pain likely extended into how invested you were in playing and enjoying the game. But if you were fortunate enough to be picked early on, you felt relief and were glad that someone had chosen you.

Inclusivity is essential in all our lives: without it, people are vulnerable to having poor mental health and experiencing feelings of loneliness and isolation. Often, healthy self-worth and self-esteem are tied to feeling included. When you feel like you don’t belong anywhere, it can lead to stress, anxiety, and depression.

At work, diversity, equity and inclusion programs are in part meant to recognize the links between inclusivity and health.
It can mean the difference between having a successful approach or whether ignorance, disregard, and fear of
losing power devolve into tokenism. When a workplace is trapped in a harmonious, conformist way of operating,
it’s not courageous enough to do the difficult work of assessing what barriers exist for people. While merely
going through the motions, companies will miss opportunities. When inclusivity exists, organizations
can experience game-changing insights, super-charged creativity and attract the most talented people to join
a group of happy and satisfied employees.

How do you create inclusive environments?

It helps to start with all the little everyday things, like the words you choose to use and how you interact in social settings. People can tell whether you are sincere, trying to be inclusive, and creating a sense of belonging for everyone. Simply tolerating someone who feels like they are on the fringe is inauthentic and certainly not being inclusive. The importance of getting inclusion right does not mean that you should be on a mission to be “indiscriminately inclusive” though.³ You need to recognize that equity, equality, and privilege are distinct.

Equity is giving people the individualized tools and support they need to succeed.
Equality is giving everyone the same thing.
Privilege is when someone cannot realize that their experiences have given them an advantage over another person. Empathy is sacrificed for judgement and comparisons that push aside opportunities for self-reflection.

Often, in pursuit of demonstrating just how inclusive we are, we can become mired in political correctness. That, too, creates discomfort and stalls real progress towards building inclusive environments. We can believe that we are
well-equipped when we’ve learned a little bit about a subject and feel empowered to stand up for those who are being,
in our judgement, persecuted. There are fine lines between appropriation, appreciation, and allyship.

Appropriation takes culturally significant elements from minority or marginalized group. It converts them into something that is devoid of meaning and diminished from the original intentions. It could involve clothing, icons, rituals, or behaviours and is often focused on power or profit by making them seem trendy, exotic, or desirable. Usually, the people appropriating feel entitled to do so and don’t realize that they are being insensitive.
Appreciation is learning about culture to understand it and gain perspective and knowledge. There isn’t any intention to misuse something or claim expertise. Quite often, permission is sought before using any part of a culture to demonstrate respect.
Allyship is a conscious choice to respectfully advocate, be supportive and accountable for helping people who feel like they don’t belong. The ally doesn’t benefit from their involvement in any way. They collaborate to achieve common goals.

Language is essential

Developing awareness of how we communicate and the language we use is key to helping create inclusivity. We use language to make connections with other people and establish belonging. It’s a fundamental of human interaction that we are constantly learning. Choosing to use inclusive language means that you are less likely to make someone
feel like they don’t belong. It frees people from using harmful words. Becoming conscious of phrases and euphemisms
you use that could make someone feel diminished will help you eliminate them. Don’t be afraid to point out problematic language when you hear it. Words and expressions that may have been popular at one time will only fade away when we hold each other accountable for the language we use. Choosing to use disrespectful language is aggressive.
It is important to remember that words can hurt deeply and may not easily be forgotten.

Much of our language is male-centric, which perpetuates detrimental stereotypes of both a speaker and their audience. Inclusive language is conscious and aware of this and avoids discrimination. For example, The United Nations has published a style guide for gender-inclusive language. It offers guidelines for using “non-discriminatory language” and “makes gender visible when it is relevant for communication.” It also advocates for not making gender visible when it is not relevant for communication.⁴ They provide examples using a scale of less inclusive versus more inclusive:

Less inclusive

Mankind
Manpower
Man-made
Guests should attend with their wives.
Fathers babysit their children.

More inclusive

Humanity
Staffing
Artificial
Guests should attend with their partners.
Fathers care for their children.

The best way to begin to evolve your language choices and speech patterns is to operate from a position of being respectful. It is not easy and will take conscious effort and practice and you will make mistakes. If you can find empathy, listen, and learn about how language constantly evolves, you may have an easier time. Becoming stuck in arguments about words being used to express collective and individual identities or freedom of speech/freedom of expression is counterproductive. Making language more specific and accurate improves communication, connection, and meaning. In the end, choosing to use hateful speech and defamatory language can have legal consequences.

Principles for using inclusive language every day

Toronto-based YouTuber, Kelly Kitagawa has shared some insightful observations about inclusive language that focuses on four main principles.⁵

1. Put the person first. Everyone is a person.

2. Respect self-identification. Use language consistent with someone’s identity. Pronouns are not preferred; they are just pronouns. Give the power to the people over their own stories and how they are described.

3. Proper nouns (names) help avoid stereotyping. They are also more specific.

4. Focus on the situation by using an active voice. It sets up your sentence to describe who is doing the action rather than what is being done to them. It’s a good way to identify and eliminate biases.

Making it easy for kids to learn inclusive language

Teaching children inclusive language at home helps them feel safe to develop their own unique identities, allows them to relate to their peers, and supports the development of that sense of belonging that is so fundamental to their health and happiness. Focus on modelling understanding and respect by making some simple language swaps.⁶

Instead of husband/wife, say partner/spouse.
Instead of girls/boys, say kids/everyone.
Instead of ladies’/men’s room, say bathroom or washroom.
Instead of brothers/sisters, say siblings.
If you don’t know someone’s gender or pronouns, instead of saying his/her, say their.

Children, by nature, are inclusive and accepting. They are constantly learning about their world and environment that and almost nothing seems unimaginable or strange to them. You can read books that support diversity in family structures to help support their learning. Here are a few that you may want to explore with your children.

The Great Big Book of Families by Mary Hoffman
A Family is a Family is a Family by Sara O’Leary
From the Stars in the Sky to the Fish in the Sea by Kai Cheng Thom

Finally, modelling inclusive language at home can help teenagers who struggle with creating and developing their own identities. Focus on creating a supportive and safe environment to incite further discussion about gender, sex, or sexual orientation. Take time to appreciate their interest in social causes, awareness, and activism by listening to them and encouraging respectful discussions.

Choosing inclusivity and belonging through language

You can demonstrate your commitment to fostering inclusivity and belonging by using inclusive language.
Here are seven tips to consider as you try:

Don’t complain about it or express that you are struggling.
Be respectful of the person and their situation.
For example:
• If you are speaking with someone who lives with a disability, “speak directly to them rather than through a companion, support person [or] interpreter.”
• Consider any extra time it might take for the person to speak.
• Avoid references that cause discomfort or are insulting.⁷
Don’t over-apologize if you make a mistake. It will happen. Your apology forces the other person to discount their feelings to make you feel better.
When someone corrects you, acknowledge them with thanks.
Reinforce your learning when you need to make a correction by practicing the correct approach three times.
If you observe a mistake, offer a quick correction. It helps the person become more aware, demonstrates respect and commitment, and shows empathy and understanding.
Consider meeting up with someone else who is working on using inclusive language to practice.

References:

Eisenberger N. I. (2012 January 27). The neural bases of social pain: evidence for shared representations with physical pain. Psychosomatic medicine, 74(2), 126–135. https://doi.org/10.1097/PSY.0b013e3182464dd1
Cook, Gareth. (2013 October 22). Why We Are Wired to Connect. Scientific American. https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/why-we-…
Rinderle, Susana. (2018, March 28). Inclusion Doesn’t Mean Including Everything and Everyone. Workforce. https://workforce.com/news/inclusion-doesnt-mean-i…
United Nations. (n.d.). Guidelines for gender-inclusive language in English. Gender-inclusive language. https://www.un.org/en/gender-inclusive-language/gu…
Kitagawa, Kelly. (2021 March 25). Why inclusive language is so important! CBC Personal Politics. [YouTube} https://youtu.be/X3RRXoUnV3c
Eng, Joanna. (2020 October 23). Simple Language Swaps To Make Your Family Vocab More LGBTQ-Inclusive. Parents Together. https://parents-together.org/simple-language-swaps…
Humber College (2017). Inclusive Language in Media: A Canadian Style Guide. http://www.humber.ca/makingaccessiblemedia/modules…

by admin

Mental Health Checkup: Preparing for the year ahead

A new year is nearly upon us. Traditionally, this is a time when many of us reflect on the previous year and make “resolutions,” or plans for the coming year. The stresses associated with the pandemic, including job losses; economic uncertainty; deaths of family members, friends or colleagues; burnout; restricted social interactions and the instability, uncertainty and fear have impacted the mental health of many. (1)

With vaccination efforts and continued vigilance, we have largely brought case numbers under control. With the pandemic having shaped our lives for the past two years, psychologists are concerned about the long-term impacts of COVID-19 on mental health, and rightly so. Past traumatic events such as natural disasters, the global economic downturn and other public health crises, such as SARS, led to lasting detrimental impacts on mental health (2) and were associated with increased rates of substance abuse, PTSD and depression. (3)

Burnout and reflection on the past year

Think about your daily routines of the past two years. You may have started your day scrolling social media and news apps, followed by working from home (video calls, sitting in front of a screen or two), helping children with online school, troubleshooting tech issues, texting, DMs, Skype or Facetime with family and ending the day with more “doomscrolling” before falling into a fitful sleep. And those days all seemed to blur together—how many times have you said “What day is it today?”

While burnout, a state of emotional, physical and mental health exhaustion caused by excessive and prolonged stress, (4) has always been around, it’s increased during the pandemic. Our work-life balance was suddenly tipped when we started “living at work” with our kitchen tables acting as our makeshift offices.

In a recent survey, 85% of respondents said their well-being had declined, 62% were struggling to meet their workload and balance work with other responsibilities, and exhaustion and cynicism were on the rise. (5)

While digital devices were a lifesaver during the pandemic—time spent on digital devices increased from 17% on gaming consoles to 45% on laptops and 76% on smartphones—they contributed to digital fatigue or digital burnout: the state of mental exhaustion from using multiple digital tools leading to lack of energy, mind fragmentation and burnout. (6)

In addition to living through a pandemic for the past two years, and all the challenges that came with it, we’ve been inundated with negative news. As events unfolded in the United States after the high-profile killings of Ahmaud Arbery, Breonna Taylor, George Floyd and others, (7) protests and political tensions escalated, including the insurrection at the US Capitol building in January 2021. In the spring, many non-Indigenous Canadians were shocked by the discovery of unmarked and mass graves of children at former Residential School sites, with Indigenous communities retraumatized by the news.

Climate change—largely forgotten during the pandemic—became front and center again in early summer as record-breaking heat in Western Canada was followed by wildfires that ravaged towns and communities leaving many without homes or jobs. (8)

Even though some of us may not be aware of it, these events, digital burnout, struggles with work-life balance, as well as the pandemic itself, have impacted our mental health and may have caused us to abandon our healthy coping strategies.

With that in mind, and as we start to come out the other side of the pandemic, the new year is an excellent time to check-in and prioritize your mental health and make realistic goals for the coming year.

What does “checking in” with your mental health mean?

First of all, what does mental health mean? As the World Health Organization defines it, “mental health is a state of well-being in which an individual realizes his or her own abilities, can cope with the normal stresses of life, can work productively and is able to make a contribution to society”. (9) It doesn’t mean that you’re happy all the time—good mental health means experiencing a full range of emotions. Our mental health affects how we think, feel, act, relate to others and our decision-making. It includes our emotional, psychological and social well-being. Poor mental health affects our physical health too; depression increases the risk for stroke, type 2 diabetes and heart disease. (10)

It’s important to recognize that there’s a difference between mental health and mental illness. Mental illness refers to a number of medical conditions; much like heart disease or diabetes are medical conditions. Mental illnesses involve changes in emotion, thinking and behaviour and are associated with distress and or problems functioning in social, work or family activities. They include depression, anxiety disorders, eating disorders and addictive behaviors. (11)

Mental health problems, when left unchecked, can become a mental illness

Checking in with your mental health is a way to determine and acknowledge how you’re actually doing. To start your mental health check-in, take some time to reflect on the following. If you notice a shift away from what is typical for you, it’s a warning to make changes to improve your mental health.

How are your sleep patterns? Are you sleeping more often than usual or less?
What is your appetite like? Are you eating more or less causing changes in weight?
How is your energy level? Is it high or low? Do you find yourself watching another show on Netflix rather than getting up and exercising, going for a walk or even cleaning the house?
Are you able to concentrate, or do you find yourself distracted?
Are you feeling optimistic about the coming year? Or pessimistic?
Are you participating in and enjoying activities and people? Many of your usual activities may not be available, but there are alternatives. Are you making efforts to shift to things you can do, such as walking, hiking, biking, virtual book club meetings, small outdoor gatherings, outdoor dining, etc.?
Is your mood low or high? Are you having difficulty getting out of bed because of your mood?
Are you irritable or feeling angry? Do you find yourself getting into arguments or yelling?

While we may all have an “off day,” if you find that you’re experiencing negative changes in your daily life for two weeks or more, it may be time to seek help.

Strategies to prepare for the year ahead

Reflecting on the emotions and experiences you’ve had during the past two years can help you build awareness and develop skills to improve your mental health. Identify the highest stress triggers, especially those during the pandemic. Some of these may have been resolved already; your children may be back at school and the pandemic news isn’t as gloomy every day. Look at the results of your mental health check in and consider how you can make improvements. Look at the start of the new year as a clean slate and a new beginning with new goals.

Build on what you found most important during the pandemic or what you missed the most. One upside to the pandemic is that for some people, the pandemic created space to slow down, spend time with family, refocus on what’s important, and connect with one another in new ways. Itai Danovitch, MD, chair of the Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Neurosciences at Cedars-Sinai points out that events like the pandemic can lead to growth. “People develop resilience. They learn how to deal with mental health challenges, and they find resources, internal and external, that they didn’t know existed.” (12)

The following can help you create an achievable action plan for the coming year that can help improve your mental health:

Digital hygiene

Delete apps from your phone. Do you need to have all those news and social media apps at your fingertips? If these have been a source of distraction and doomscrolling, delete them! You can reinstall them later when you feel back on track. If you want to keep your apps, set time limits and ensure that you stick to them.
If you’re working from home and feel you haven’t created a good work-life balance, set boundaries between your personal life and work life. When your workday is done, power off your laptop, close it up and put it and your files away. You’ll be less tempted to “just check your email” if you have to power on your computer.
Take frequent breaks from screen use and structure time in your workday for offline work.

Set realistic, achievable and specific goals

Creating goals is an excellent way to improve your sleep, eating habits, and exercise and activity regime. If your goals are too vague (such as, “get better sleep” or “eat better”), it’s difficult to achieve them. What defines better sleep for you? A more specific and achievable goal would be: “Lights out by 10 and leave my phone/laptop/tablet downstairs at night.”
Write down your goals to hold yourself accountable and keep track of your progress.

Get active

One of the most effective ways to improve your mental health is regular activity and exercise. Again, set realistic, achievable and specific goals to jump start your activity.
Recruit family members to join you or plan regular socially distanced activities with friends. Walking, biking, jogging/running, skiing and yoga are activities that you can gradually increase the intensity of as your fitness level increases.
Set reminders in your phone to take short breaks to stretch or walk around your home/office throughout your workday.
Have a back-up plan for activities you can do inside during inclement weather (reading, baking, cooking, and even cleaning).

Improve your concentration

Use to-do lists and prioritize your top tasks for each day. Adjust your list as the week goes on and your priorities change.
Focus on one task at a time; avoid jumping from task to task or multi-tasking.
Set scheduled breaks to stretch or go for a short walk to clear your mind.
Organize your desk to remove distracting clutter. Put your phone away so you’re not tempted to check messages.

Make plans for the coming year

As venues and travel begin to open up, make plans. Even if you’re hesitant about international travel or large indoor events, you can choose smaller events and gatherings with small group of friends. It’s okay to feel hesitant about going to a party at a friend’s house or attending a concert or play, even if others in your circle are taking the leap. Take small steps by grabbing a quick coffee with friends or having a friend over for a movie.
Make travel plans closer to home; there are likely lots of unexplored places close to home and you can take advantage of this time to check out places you’ve heard of, but never visited.
Prioritize safe visits with people important to you; whether that’s family or friends.

You may find that as parts of your life slowly return to normal, you begin to feel the impacts of everything we’ve collectively experienced. You need to determine what you need to recover and heal from what’s been a very difficult time. Everyone’s different and what works for your family or friends, may not work for you. That’s okay. Self-compassion and self-care are essential, as well as time to adjust to post-pandemic life.

If you find that you or someone you care about is consistently in a low mood, lashing out or doesn’t know how to start making changes, speak to your primary care giver, or contact your Employee Family Assistance Program for options available to you. You are not alone.

References:

Abbott, A. (2021, February 3) COVID’s mental-health toll: how scientists are tracking a surge in depression. Retrieved on June 22, 2021 from
https://www.nature.com/articles/d41586-021-00175-z
Savage, M. (2020, October 28) Coronavirus: the possible long-term mental health impacts. Retrieved on June 23, 2021 from https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20201021-coronavirus-the-possible-long-term-mental-health-impacts
Cedars Sinai. (2020, November 24) Long-term impacts of COVID-19: your mental health. Retrieved on July 7, 2021 from https://www.cedars-sinai.org/newsroom/long-term-impacts-of-covid-19-your-mental-health/
Queen, D. and K. Harding. (2020, July 6) Societal pandemic burnout: a COVID legacy. Retrieved on June 23, 2021 from https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1111/iwj.13441
Beheshti, N. (2021, March 11) Is pandemic burnout draining your motivation and energy? Here’s how we can all promote recovery. Retrieved on June 23, 2021 from https://www.forbes.com/sites/nazbeheshti/2021/03/11/is-pandemic-burnout-draining-your-motivation-and-energy-heres-how-we-can-all-promote-recovery/?sh=5b3e41b91c02
Sharma, M.K., et al. Digital burnout: COVID-19 lockdown mediates excessive technology use stress. WorldSoc Psychiatry. 2020: 2:171-2. Retrieved on June 24, 2021 from https://www.researchgate.net/publication/343724873_Digital_Burnout_COVID-19_Lockdown_Mediates_Excessive_Technology_Use_Stress
Dungca, N., J. Abelson, M. Berman, J. Sullivan. (2020, June 8) A dozen high-profile fatal encounters that have galvanized protests nationwide. Retrieved on July 6, 2021 from https://www.washingtonpost.com/investigations/a-dozen-high-profile-fatal-encounters-that-have-galvanized-protests-nationwide/2020/06/08/4fdbfc9c-a72f-11ea-b473-04905b1af82b_story.html
Baum, K.B., I. Semeniuk, M. McClearn. (2021, July 1) B.C.s heat wave and fires were driven by climate change, and they won’t be the last. What must we do next? Globe and Mail. Retrieved on July 7, 2021 from https://www.theglobeandmail.com/canada/article-western-canadas-deadly-heat-wave-is-driven-by-climate-change-will-it/
WHO. (2018, March 30) Mental health: strengthening our response. Retrieved on June 22, 2021 from https://www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/mental-health-strengthening-our-response
CDC. (n.d.) Learn about mental health. Retrieved on June 22, 2021 from https://www.cdc.gov/mentalhealth/learn/index.htm
Mayo Clinic. Mental illness. Retrieved on July 6, 2021 from https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/mental-illness/symptoms-causes/syc-20374968
Cedars-Sinai. (2020, November 24) Long-term impacts of COVID-19: your mental health. Retrieved on July 7, 2021 from https://www.cedars-sinai.org/newsroom/long-term-impacts-of-covid-19-your-mental-health/

by admin

Overcoming Financial Fatigue and Concern

Starting a new calendar year can be exciting and refreshing, but it can also be stressful. January 1^st typically brings renewed motivation with the gift of a clean slate and the desire for a promising year ahead. It’s often fulfilled with a focus on healthy eating and exercise to get back on track after the holiday season’s indulgence. But January can also be full of transitions that can influence anxiety and concern. For some, it’s having to head back to work or school after enjoying some time away. For others, it’s increased pressure related to personal finances and how to manage expenses and income in the coming year, especially as bills for holiday spending start to arrive. For many more, the ups and downs of living through the COVID-19 pandemic and the unique financial challenges have given rise to the need for new ideas and thinking about financial preparedness.

In this article, we’ll look at ways to acknowledge and manage financial fatigue. We’ll also share some tips that could help alleviate some of your concerns about money management in the coming year.

Stressful situations can escalate worry

Under normal circumstances, different situations can affect our available time and income disproportionately. The continued pressures and uncertainty many people feel while living life in the pandemic can increase stress exponentially.

Students who are starting their post-secondary studies for example, may be concerned about paying tuition and fees while wrestling with campus restrictions and closures that are changing the very model of what they expected student life to be. An overwhelming majority of classes continue to be hosted online using video conferencing technology. While faculty are doing their best to ensure that learning objectives are met, something is missing. The natural camaraderie and friendships that are part of an on-campus learning experience aren’t as easily replicated in an online environment. This method of learning requires more planning, personal dedication and focus.

Reflecting on the significance of the cumulative stress they feel, many students contemplate the value they are receiving from this education model.

Another worry for students may involve housing. Some will have made arrangements thinking that campuses might have re-opened for the winter semester. Unfortunately, it may be difficult for them to back out of these commitments. As a result, they will continue to incur expenses tied to living away from home.

On the flip side, other students are finishing their education journeys and will be looking for gainful employment to situate themselves as recent graduates. The job market fluctuates depending on the industry. Although there may be great demand in some fields, others remain closed due to COVID-19 concerns. Graduates needing to secure income may be confronted with the need to temporarily return to lower-paying jobs. At best, many industries remain somewhat fragile and continue to be impacted by COVID-19 policies and restrictions. In some instances, students may find positions that can receive pandemic funding or supports to help employers with the cost of bringing on new staff. Others may wish to focus on expanded roles within industries working to supply necessary goods and services to help with efforts to contain COVID-19. Regardless of what’s available, the concern and stress around the cost of living expenses will heighten if a student also needs to factor in loan repayments.

Apart from students, the pandemic has also resulted in many jobs being deemed “non-essential services” and subject to pandemic-related shutdowns based on emergency measures legislation. This shutdown of the economy resulted in a significant number of layoffs, both permanent and temporary. While some people have been able to return to work, others await industry re-openings. Still, more have been affected by the closures of many companies. People who qualified for relief and assistance have been able to find a bit of relief, but it generally follows a finite timeframe. Generally, people who find themselves unemployed may be facing additional stressors of trying to leverage transferrable skills to find temporary work in another role. It also means that they need to manage finances more carefully and strategically because they are working with smaller income sources.

Consider changing money habits for some smaller wins

There are several different ways you can work through the financial stress you’ve been experiencing and come out on top. Taking the time to develop additional financial habits and strengths now can help you manage your money more wisely over the coming year.

Budgeting with boundaries

The best place to start with is budgeting and spending boundaries. If you are not in the routine of sticking to a budget and setting rules to guide your spending, it’s time to remedy and adopt a workable solution. There are many resources available to help you determine the best approach to creating a simple budget. It doesn’t need to be any fancier than getting a handle on how much money is coming in each month and how much is going out. You can branch into different spending categories and look at the rules or boundaries you want to attach to them.

Gift-giving

Have a critical look at how much you set aside each year for celebrations and gift-giving. At the moment, you may not be visiting or gathering with family and friends very often. You may be doing less spending as a result. Consider the reason why you give gifts and talk about it with those who participate in gift exchanges. There may be different ways to approach gift giving that could reduce or eliminate some financial stress.

Online Shopping

Another spending category to evaluate is online spending. This method of shopping has increased significantly in the past year as a result of COVID-19 and simple convenience. Be aware of marketing campaigns and messages companies use to tempt you to buy products. The temptation of time-limited deals could see you falling victim to a scarcity mindset. Watch out for bundling and tiered discounts too. They are all in place to encourage you to spend more. Finally, think about how reduced spending in one budget category might be able to have you repurpose funds to another. If you have been working from home and will continue to do so, you may have reduced clothing and travel expenses which may result in the ability to find savings.

Critique your spending habits and be open to change

It may also be time to look at your overall spending habits and decide where to spend your money. Are the “things” you are purchasing filling an emotional void?

Do they present you with a false sense of happiness? Determine what’s most important for you and play to your strengths. Work your decisions into your budget. As part of the work you’re doing in this area, you may want to consider embracing the second-hand economy as both a seller and a buyer. You can arrange for cashless payments and porch pickups to maintain distancing guidelines and limit the risk of exposure.

Explore different ways to save and start now

Start saving for big-ticket budget categories as early as possible. You can try many variations that use both cash and digital methods to separate funds and help visualize progress against your savings goals. If you can get into the routine of paying yourself first, you might not notice the funds being diverted to savings.

Method one: Round every purchase to the closest 10, 20 or 30 dollars and move the rounded off funds to a savings account.

Do you find yourself describing a purchase automatically in an even dollar amount? For example, if you buy an item for $8.55, you might naturally round that purchase up to $10 in your mind. You could then take the $1.45 from your rounding and deposit that to a savings account instead. Over time, these little amounts will add up, and you probably won’t even miss the money. Your mental math skills might get a boost too!

Method two: Take advantage of automatic savings deposits and automatic payments. This one is simple and can sometimes work with your employer or your financial institution. Start setting aside as little as $10 each pay for an automatic deposit. Putting it into an investment account or a savings account will allow you to take full advantage of compounding interest where available. It’s a way that you can pay yourself first.

Method three: Use a pattern or formula to double your savings in eight-week cycles.

Start by saving…

Week 1	$1.00
Week 2	$2.00
Week 3	$4.00
Week 4	$8.00
Week 5	$16.00
Week 6	$32.00
Week 7	$64.00
Week 8	$128.00

At the end of each eight-week cycle, you will have saved $255. After a full year of eight-week cycles, you’ll have close to $1700.

You may want to explore these kinds of saving options to create or rebuild a “rainy day fund”. If there’s anything we’ve seen from COVID-19 so far, it’s that it is very unpredictable. By looking at your finances differently, you will be able to adapt and manage events and feel more connected to and in control of your money.

December 20, 2020

Surviving September

For many people, it’s hard to find a reason not to treasure our summers.Time seems to move differently. We tend to slow down and relax more, enjoying outside spaces, and basking in the bands of sunlight that stretch effortlessly right into the evening. Summer typically represents a time to gather with family and friends and enjoy each other’s company, too, usually enjoying outdoor spaces. We play games, splash, paddle and swim in the water, and stay up late around bonfires looking at the stars lighting up the night sky. It’s a chance for us to renew our spirits and build-up our mental health. As August rounds the bend, it’s a bit like we’re savouring the last moments of that summertime vibe. We’re then faced with the new challenges and goals September brings. It requires a new focus and preparation. It’s a month full of change and transition, and we don’t just mean the leaves.

While many people manage transition well, for others, change and getting back into the September swing of things can build cumulative stress to the point of feeling completely overwhelmed.

We’re sharing some ideas about how to recognize those stressors at this time of year, not just in ourselves but also in the people we care about; how we can move through the month feeling well supported; and how the COVID-19 pandemic has and is affecting our mental health. Perhaps we need to re-evaluate how we don’t just survive the month but thrive.

Have you ever experienced Stresstember?

It’s natural to feel emotional, physical, and mental stress, and there are certain times when pressure tends to be heightened. September, with all of its anticipation, expectations and realizations that we’re in the bottom third of the year, can trigger stress responses during all of the preparation to get back or into new routines. But being able to recognize how we react and respond to stress is most important to learn so that we can shape a response and not let anxiety or fear take over.

Stress affects “your body, your thoughts and feelings, and your behaviour” and can contribute to more complicated health problems like “high blood pressure, heart disease, obesity and diabetes.” (1)

Stress shows up in our bodies as:

Headaches
Muscle tension or pain
Chest pain
Fatigue
Upset stomach
Sleep problems

Stress shows up in our thoughts and feelings as:

Anxiety
Restlessness
Lack of motivation or focus
Feeling overwhelmed
Irritability or anger
Sadness or depression

Stress shows up in our behaviour as:

Changes in appetite – overeating or undereating
Angry outbursts
Drug or alcohol misuse
Tobacco use
Social withdrawal
Loss of interest in exercise and reduced frequency (2)
Changes in sex drive

In children, stress can appear in behaviours such as moodiness, clingy or uncharacteristically emotional or aggressive behaviours. Being afraid of the dark, afraid to go to sleep because of nightmares, of being alone, or being around strangers can all be signs of stress in children. Look for nail-biting, hair twisting, cheek chewing or other nervous habits too. Also, having trouble focusing or concentrating and toileting accidents may be signs your child is under too much stress.

Stress can show up in your co-workers behaviour as changes in performance or productivity, increased consumption of coffee or alcohol, being away an unusually high number of sick-days, an increase in workplace accidents, being defensive, being argumentative, or even sharing a low mood and cynicism.

September typically introduces a trifecta of stress response triggers: time, school or work, and finances. It’s been recognized as one of the most “anxiety-inducing” months of the year – even leading to a new social media #Stresstember hashtag in recent years. (3) Commutes can be unpredictable as everyone is adapting to revised schedules. There’s a fear of the unknown with new routines and new people – at school, it’s new teachers and new classmates, and at work, it could be new job duties, new bosses or co-workers and a rush towards end-of-year objectives. It can also be an expensive month with increased spending on items such as school supplies, seasonally appropriate clothing for cooler weather, and fees for new or resuming activities. It can also be a mental shift for people and show up as seasonal affective disorders that coincide with seasonal changes.

What’s happening to a stressed-out brain?

It’s interpreting your stress as a threat. It’s kicking your behavioural and emotional responses into high-gear by flooding your nervous system with hormones like adrenaline and cortisol to get you ready to react to the perceived emergency as quickly as possible. Your blood pressure rises, your breathing becomes more rapid, and your heart beats faster. Your senses are then primed to take in the slightest change in your surroundings so you can make a split-second decision to either fight, flee, or freeze. Once you determine that the threat has passed, it can take you up to 30 minutes to clear those stress hormones from your body and return to feeling calm. (4)

Why September 2020 is a really big deal

Let’s face it. This year has not turned out as anyone expected. With the reality of the global pandemic response to the Novel Coronavirus, COVID-19, and subsequent upheaval of the lives we led before mid-March, we collectively have been experiencing extremely high stress on many levels, and it has been taking its toll.

The lockdown; quarantining; self-isolating; physical distancing; online learning; working from home; losing a job, business, or other sources of income; cancelling unessential travel; missing graduation and rites of passage; postponing special events; mass social reaction and protests; dealing with financial challenges and so very much more that we haven’t even accounted for the traumatic, stress-inducing events that are affecting people’s lives seemingly all at once, without any chance to pause, reflect, and process what has happened.

What we thought we’d be doing this summer was not what we did. In many instances, things we thought we would be doing this spring didn’t happen, leaving many loose ends that may never be tied. Everyone is sensitive, wary, tentative, frustrated, upset, and angry, and it can be awkward.

We still need practice getting back to the business of being around others socially, even if that means adopting virtual or telephone routines and/or learning how to interact safely. We need to acknowledge that for some people, what they expected for their September has put their lives on a completely different path than where they assumed they would be. Post-secondary students, eager for their first taste of young adulthood and campus life, maybe in programs that are still learning off-campus.

People who were looking at retiring are now wondering how they can manage to do so with the economic situation potentially, a long way from returning back to pre-pandemic levels. Everything has changed so significantly, it’s almost like we can add the “lost summer of 2020” to a very long list of disappointments that have accumulated throughout the year. It’s emotional. It’s not okay. One of the worst parts of this shared collective experience has been the uncertainty. Even now, we don’t have all of the answers or solutions that feel airtight yet. But we can recognize that we are experiencing stress. We can realize that this is all a part of grieving that needs to happen. However, we can still very much determine how we respond.

Tried and true coping strategies that can always help

There are always things we can do to help us move forward through this challenging month. Being aware of what could potentially heighten stress and create those body, mind, and actions that are our stress-detecting alarms is one way to feel better supported and more in control. Creating small goals that break down everything that happens in September into more manageable pieces can help too. By looking at how you are moving through the small stuff, you can feel like you can keep moving forward.

You should also try to recognize the need for flexibility in your life and the lives of others as well. Being able to press pause on something and pick it back up later can release some of the pressure we put on ourselves or others. Flexibility can make people feel less anxious, happier, grateful, and more satisfied.

Getting enough sleep, especially now that routines are potentially restarting, is essential to help you feel well-rested, confident, and attentive. Sleep can help with creativity, as your brain will be ready to be stimulated and can be both focused and relaxed when you need it to be. One study showed that people who doodled while they were “listening to a list of people’s names were able to remember 29 percent more of the information later.” (5)

Taking time to get organized in advance for what might cause the most considerable stress during the month will help immensely. Make a list of your top priorities and top problems. If it’s time, look at your schedule on a calendar. Add others’ schedules there too. If it’s finances, work on a budget and create a financial roadmap for yourself for the rest of the year. Having a big picture view of everything will allow you to break everything down into those smaller, more manageable parts and relieve you of the stress in the moment of feeling like you’ve forgotten something.

It’s okay to say no. September tends to bring on a mindset that overwork is routine and just part of what happens during this month. Stop before it starts. Don’t take on more than you need to. You don’t have to participate in something that isn’t a right or comfortable fit for your time or your feelings. Know that you’re full, and you don’t need to feel pressured to take on any more.

Take time for yourself to be present. Breathing, meditation and visualization exercises, and yoga are all important activities that heal your mind, body and spirit.

Eat well, with foods that nourish rather than foods that create stress. Putting healthy fuel into your system will give you more endurance, stamina and energy to keep going.Partnering proper nutrition with a simple exercise — such as walking — is even better, making you more resilient and helping you feel that you’re at your best.

Other considerations to help

Recently, we’ve been relying on technology to provide a kind of surrogate connectivity, a way to stay in touch socially. But it’s important to recognize that in combination with some other not-so-healthy activities and/or behaviours, it can also be responsible for increasing stress triggering anxiety and depression. Spending a lot of time online is exhausting. People may be feeling fatigued and experiencing eye strain. Watch how much time is spent on social media, video conferencing, and playing games. It’s all screen time, and it can wear you down, zapping your energy because it “doesn’t completely fill the void of socializing.” (6) Make time to get outside and get a change of scenery. If you can do it with a friend in a safe and permitted manner, that’s even better. Try talking about subjects other than what’s been happening in the news. Listen to one another and simply enjoy each other’s company.

It’s also important to acknowledge our losses – social, environmental, assumptions and safety, trust in systems and institutions, and recognize that you may also be empathic for what other people may be grieving. Talking about how you feel and what has been happening from your experience is a necessary step to take in working through that grief. You may want to explore different workshops that can transform your feelings into a work of art, or help you create something that captures the “intense, painful energy…[and placing it] into an inanimate object that [can] be symbolically” thrown away. (7) A part of healing from the pain and processing the grief is to recognize things you are grateful for in your life. It can go a long way towards helping you shift perspective to a more hopeful position.

Help is available for mental health and substance use support

In addition to your EFAP program, all Canadians can access Innovative resources funded by Health Canada, such as Wellness Together Canada. Free to use, there are online and texting-based supports, coaching and communities, counselling and courses, self-assessment tools, and other helpful resources to explore. If you aren’t familiar with these services, yet, they are worth looking into. You might find what you’ve been looking for and feel better and more supported.

References:

Mayo Clinic Staff. (N.D). Stress Symptoms: Effects on your body and behaviour, Healthy Lifestyle Stress Management. Retrieved on May 19, 2020 from https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/stress-symptoms/art-20050987
Ibid.
Moss, Jennifer. (2019, September 3). How to Help Employees Overcome September Stress. SHRM. Retrieved on May 19, 2020 from https://www.shrm.org/resourcesandtools/hr-topics/employee-relations/pages/how-to-help-employees-overcome-september-stress.aspx
Moyer, Nancy. (2019, April 22). Amygdala Hijack: When Emotion Takes Over. Healthline. Retrieved on May 19, 2020 from https://www.healthline.com/health/stress/amygdala-hijack
Ibid.
Gray, Dan. (2020, May 4). Yes, “Quarantine Fatigue” is Real. Here’s How to Cope. Healthline. Retrieved on May 19, 2020 from https://www.healthline.com/health-news/quarantine-fatigue-is-real-heres-how-to-cope
O’Neill, Stephanie. (2020, March 26). Coronavirus Has Upended Our World. It’s OK to Grieve. NPR. Retrieved on May 19, 2020 from https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2020/03/26/820304899/coronavirus-has-upended-our-world-its-ok-to-grieve

August 12, 2020

Importance of Sleep

In need of a comfortable, restful night’s sleep?

Quality sleep – the kind that makes you look refreshed and feeling energized – is exactly what the doctor ordered. In fact, sleep is as important to your health as diet, nutrition and exercise.

The right amount and quality of sleep improves attention, behaviour, memory, and overall mental and physical health; it also helps the body maintain and regulate many vital functions.

A 2015 report from the National Sleep Foundation identified that most adults need between seven to nine hours of sleep each night to function at their best during the day, and to keep their body and mind in optimal shape.¹

Lack of sleep has been linked to a range of negative health and, social and performance outcomes which can impact an individual’s personal and professional life. Not surprising, a 2017 report found the majority of Canadians generally don’t get enough sleep on a daily basis, thereby affecting their health. Approximately 20 per cent of the country sleeps between six and seven hours every night and six per cent sleep less than six hours per night.²

Signs that you’re not getting enough sleep

Here are 10 signs that your mind and body require more sleep:

You’re experiencing unexpected variances in mood. When sleep deprived, you’re more susceptible to crankiness, irritability, and have greater difficulty coping with stress.
You’re noticing weight gain. Sleeping fewer than six hours a night can increase the hunger-stimulating hormone, ghrelin, which makes your body crave sugary and fatty foods.
You’re more impulsive. When sleep deprived, you’re generally less inhibited, causing you to act or speak without thinking or evaluating first.
Your reaction times are slower. When fatigued, it takes you longer to process situations, as your concentration is lowered, resulting in longer response times.
Your noticing lower levels of performance and productivity. Fatigue can negatively affect your ability to focus, reason, and even find the correct words to describe simple things.
You have little or no interest in intimacy. When tired and exhausted, many people are not in the mood nor have the energy for meaningful connection or displays of affection including sexual contact at the end of the day.
You’re unable to remember things. When you’re tired, you’re not exerting the amount of attention required when trying to form a memory.
You’re having difficulty making decisions. With chronic sleep deprivation, your brain’s ability to process information, emotions and the ability to read social situations can decrease.
You get sick more often. By not getting enough sleep, your immune system is impacted, which can lower your body’s ability to fight off viruses.
You’re not looking your best. If you don’t get enough sleep, your skin doesn’t have the time to repair itself. Your skin can look older, dark under-eye circles may appear, as well as red, puffy eyes.

Steps to take to maintain healthy sleep habits

Your life may feel busy all the time, and perhaps your current sleep habits, arrangements and quality are less than ideal, but there’s hope! There are many ways to improve your rest, and consciously incorporating even a few of them will likely lead to a more restful and enjoyable sleeping experience.

Create a relaxing evening ritual. Do things that relax you to create a pre-sleep routine that removes some of your daily stress. Over time, a routine may act as a signal within your brain that it’s time to sleep. Use common favourites like a warm bath or massage or try other calming activities like meditating, breathing exercises or listening to soothing music as you wind down.

Stick with a routine that includes a predictable sleep schedule. Keep your meals, bedtime and morning alarm consistent, even on weekends. Maintaining sleep patterns conditions your body to expect and react accordingly to appropriate times of rest and wakefulness.

Use your bed for sleep… and sleep alone. Keep electronics, food and any other stimulating activities out of your bed. This will cue your brain to sleep – and not prepare itself for eating, reading, TV, video games, studying or chatting on the phone when you lie down.

Remove electronics from your bedroom. Screens and electronics are an integral part of our daily lives. The activities associated with them, the light they emit, and the stimulus they provide, make televisions, computers, tablets, phones and other digital items a major hindrance to sleep. Try to unplug at least an hour before bed and keep electronics out of the bedroom.

Keep your bedroom quiet, cool, and dark. Remove light and sound distraction and keep your space at a constant temperature to mimic your ideal sleeping conditions.

Steer clear of caffeine and other stimulants. In the hours before bed, but also throughout the day, be mindful of your caffeine intake. Remember that coffee and tea aren’t the only caffeine-laden beverages: many soft drinks, chocolate, common medications and herbal remedies also contain caffeine.

Exercise. A well-known stress-reliever is regular exercise (30-60 minutes, three times weekly). People who exercise regularly have better quality, deeper sleep, and are, overall, healthier. Of course, exercise is a natural energy-booster as well, so be sure to get in that workout at least three hours before bedtime.

Limit your napping. If you absolutely must nap, keep it short – 15 to 20 minutes in the early afternoon.

Avoid going to bed on a full – or empty – stomach. Balanced, healthy meals during the day will help keep your body and blood sugars balanced for optimal sleep. If you’re hungry, have a light, nutritious snack (low-fat dairy or turkey) that won’t sit heavily in your stomach or boost your energy.

Sleeping is such an important part of a mindful, healthy, balanced life and most of us could use more of it, and its benefits. So, make a point of implementing some new sleep strategies, jump into those PJs and sweet dreams!

Serious health risks associated with lack of sleep

Not surprisingly, over time, a lack of adequate sleep can be associated with a shortened lifespan. Multiple studies have shown that sleeping less than five hours per night may increase mortality risk by up to 15 percent.³

As our lives are crowded with familial, professional and other activities, many of us overlook the potential consequences, squeezing more and more into our days and nights, leaving quality rest as an afterthought. Even reducing that optimal eight hours by two or three per night can dramatically increase the odds of developing some of the following physical and mental health conditions:

Alzheimer’s
Cardiovascular disease
Compromised immune function
Depression
Diabetes
Hypertension
Obesity
Susceptibility to injury

In order to live a healthy and balanced lifestyle, you need to ensure sleep is a priority. Lack of sleep can cause you to get sick mentally and physically, so be aware of the symptoms of lack of sleep, and actively work each night to ensure you keep your sleep schedule.

References:

Roussy, Kas. “Experts unveil new sleep guidelines for children .” CBC News. Canadian Broadcasting Corporation, 13 June 2016. Web.
National Sleep Foundation. (2015). How Much Sleep Do We Really Need? Retrieved July 1, 2017, from https://sleepfoundation.org/how-sleep-works/how-much-sleep-do-we-really-need
Not getting enough sleep? You’re not alone — and that’s bad for all of us. Pete Evans – http://www.cbc.ca/news/business/lack-of-sleep-rand-1.4029406
Quantifying the Economic Costs of Insufficient Sleep. (n.d.). Retrieved January 25, 2018, from https://www.rand.org/randeurope/research/projects/the-value-of-the-sleep-economy.html
7 Sneaky Signs You’re Not Getting Enough Sleep. (n.d.). Retrieved January 25, 2018, from https://www.realsimple.com/health/preventative-health/sleep/sneaky-signs-sleep-deprived
CMHA BC, and AnxietyBC. “Wellness Module 6: Getting A Good Night’s Sleep.” HereToHelp. Canadian Mental Health Association BC, 2016. Web. <http://www.heretohelp.bc.ca/ wellness-module/wellness-module-6-getting-a-good-nights-sleep>.
Division of Sleep Medicine at Harvard Medical School, and WGBH Educational Foundation. “Sleep and Health.” Get Sleep. Division of Sleep Medicine at Harvard Medical School, 16 Jan. 2008. Web. <http://healthysleep.med.harvard.edu/need-sleep/whats-in-it-for-you/health>.

July 14, 2020

Self-Care: Time and Attention for you

With evolving demands, challenges faced in our everyday lives, and with recent global disruptions, including isolation and quarantine measures, self-care has received increased profile and attention. Most people realize that it’s a big part of living well. But have you ever thought about what good self-care looks like? If you look beyond rewarding and treating yourself, you can explore a more profound purpose that could be life-changing.

Developing a healthy self-care practice means that you are willing to do some work to discover what makes you feel fulfilled. You’re also willing to try and achieve a better balance between your physical and mental health. There are a lot of aspects that help you form a sense of self that you may not have explored. How they interact and support your beliefs about the concept you have about yourself is a big part of understanding why self-care is so important.

Most often, these are components you use to determine how you operate in the world and whether or not you feel whole:

Self-acceptance – This is how much you “embrace all facets of yourself– not just the positive, more “esteem-able” parts.” (1)
Self-compassion – This is about how you act towards yourself when you are feeling challenged, having a tough time, or being critical of something you don’t like about yourself. (2)
Self-confidence – This is a feeling of how much you trust yourself to do things.
Self-esteem – This is how much value you attribute to yourself after you act on or experience something. It’s influenced by other people’s reactions to you and by how you compare yourself to others.
Self-love – This is how much kindness, caring, and respect you exhibit for yourself.
Self-understanding – This is how well you know yourself, your feelings, your likes and dislikes, your abilities and capabilities.
Self-worth – This is your steady-state opinion of yourself. It’s derived from self-understanding, self-love and self-acceptance. When it’s high, you feel worthy and deserving of great things. High self-worth can protect you from outside influences that try to bring you down. (3)

Self-care is intentional and taps into self-realization

Having a good self-care regimen means that you perform deliberate actions to help you feel your best. It means

that you are in tune with the physical, emotional, social, personal, spiritual, security, financial and work aspects of your life. It also means that you attempt to find balance in each of those areas because you recognize it as part of your responsibility in life.

If you’re not used to doing this, it can be difficult to start. You might even be self-conscious or shy to do so because there may be a touch of the stigma associated with self-care. Fundamentally, self-care is an essential part of being human and living your best life. But other people may think that the actions associated with self-care are selfish. This may be an indication that they are lacking in their self-care practices and could benefit from developing a practice of their own.

Sometimes, society can influence our thinking too much and change how we view self-care practices. With predetermined ideas of socially acceptable self-care, this presents its own set of challenges. People can be stuck on the notion that many self-care activities are gender-stereotyped. For example, does it make a difference if someone wants to recharge with a bubble-bath, manicure/pedicure, or by racing an all-terrain vehicle through a muddy bog? The truth is that self-care activities, no matter what they are, can help promote a better sense of self and overall wellness, and therefore apply to everyone.

Unfortunately, self-care is also a lucrative industry

Interestingly enough, some self-care activities continue to be affected by a noticeable difference in pricing, often referred to as the “Pink Tax.” It means that the cost of the same activity can be higher for people who identify as female. It’s something so ingrained in our culture, we don’t often recognize it. Since self-care is also tied to body sensations such as stress and anxiety, we often feel more vulnerable and our decision making can be easily influenced.

It’s important to see beyond the promotional and commercial aspects within the $10 billion a year self-care/wellness industry. Falling into that trap can have harmful effects and counteract the intentions to pursue something personally restorative. For someone with untreated alcohol addiction, for example, one glass of wine may not just help them unwind. That glass could become more damaging to their psyche and be a catalyst to them unravelling. Similarly, influencer and celebrity culture can make people begin to think that self-care is out of reach because it is “exclusive, elusive, and also expensive.” (4)

Unfortunately, social media provides a very effective forum for people to express visceral comments related to self-care activities, regardless of who is sharing. If you review the comments on many posts, you’ll see evidence of shaming and punishing people. Still, others feel compelled to share “proof” of their participation in self-care activities through social media.

This can be an incredibly harmful reason to publicly share something that, in essence, is a very private exercise. Don’t feel that you have to agree to things you wouldn’t usually agree to or being nice to everyone. If you aren’t entirely comfortable, you may want to call into question your motivation to be so public about your self-care activities.

Consider that your fear of missing out (FOMO) and need to share luxurious indulgences may actually be influenced by insecurities around social interactions and socializing. Listen carefully and critically to messages from the diet and cosmetics industries. They’ve capitalized on mass marketing self-care products through words that promise things that seem too good to be true. Recognize these as inauthentic and do your homework before spending your hard earned money.

You may also want to think for a moment about how, culturally, we have normalized alcohol and drug consumption and masked it as self-care. What we know to be addictive behaviour can sometimes be overlooked when shopping for retail goods, viewing beloved television shows and characters, and attending gatherings or events. Those tea towels with the humorous saying about why it’s okay to pour yourself another glass of wine or to chuckle at a story about how a character accidentally ate a particular batch of brownies feel harmless. However, we need to consider that this has the potential to overlook how dangerous this can be for someone who struggles with addiction as part of their daily life. In these circumstances, purported self-care activities can be self-destructive.

Creating a plan for regular and long-term self-care

It’s important to recognize warning signs or indications that you need to take time for self-care. Feeling distracted, burnt-out and having difficulty concentrating, experiencing brain fogginess, or being unusually emotional are all indicators.

Thankfully, developing a good self-care practice in its purest form consists of four things that won’t cost you a lot of money, nor a lot of time:

Getting enough sleep – Aim for between 7-8 hours at night, and if you can manage it, plan for a mid-afternoon nap of 20 minutes. Rest is essential to reset our brains after the events of each day. Going to sleep is like a deep cleaning. Physiologically and mentally, it can work wonders.
Eat well, be inspired by proper nutrition – Get inspired to add more healthy foods to your diet and reduce consumption of things that are not nourishing. Having a special favourite meal or food is excellent, in moderation.
Make time to lead an active lifestyle – The least expensive way to exercise is to go for a walk. You don’t need any costly equipment or memberships. You can head out the door and explore the world or take the dog around the block. Plan for at least 30 minutes of exercise each day as part of a good self-care practice.
Enjoy the silence – We’re often convinced that if we aren’t doing something, we’re wasting time. In fact, being present in the moment with stillness and silence is something we all need. Plan for at least 15 minutes a day to meditate, bird watch, or even just sit and listen to your breath. Our fear of boredom is over-exaggerated. It’s an essential part of human nature and allowing yourself to feel bored sometimes stimulates, “contemplation, daydreaming [and] it can spur creativity.” (5)
Do things that work for you

Ultimately, determining what motivates you to care and change your behaviour is crucial, and developing the commitment to regular self-care practices is, in fact, essential.

Yes, if spa days, bubble baths, star gazing, cooking, listening to or playing music, massage therapy, painting, knitting, reading, and watching your favourite tv show are your thing, that’s wonderful! You’re practicing self-care, as long as they are cognitive choices that you are making that will help you recharge your sense of self. It’s the key to motivation. If you’re doing any of these for the wrong reasons, you aren’t going to derive the full benefits.

But don’t be afraid to try new things or recognize little things that you’ve perhaps always done as self-care measures that benefit your physical and mental health. Grounding yourself through focused breathing has been proven to have significant effects by reducing stress hormones, inducing calmness and easing hypertension. Singing can be a natural anti-depressant, improve your memory and give your lungs a workout. If you’re shy, sing in the car or the shower. Finally, laughter is good medicine and is linked to vascular health and good hormone and neurotransmitter levels.

In the end, you should aim to reduce worry and manage stress. Practicing instinctive self-care (without even knowing you are doing so) can lead to a healthier, more balanced and fulfilling approach to life.

References

Seltzer, Leon, F. Ph.D. (Sept. 10, 2008). The Path to Unconditional Self-Acceptance. Psychology Today [Blog] Retrieved on March 2, 2020 from https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/blog/evolution-…
Neff, Kristin, Dr. (2020). The three elements of self-compassion. Self-Compassion [Website] Retrieved on March 2, 2020 from https://self-compassion.org/the-three-elements-of-…
Sincinski, Adam. (2019). How To Build Self-Worth And Start Believing In Yourself Again. IQMatrix [Blog]self. Retrieved on March 2, 2020 from https://blog.iqmatrix.com/self-worth
Goodman, Whitney. (July 12, 2019). When Self-Care Becomes A Weapon. Psychology Today. Retrieved on March 2, 2020 from https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/blog/healing-to…
Steward, Jude. (June 2017). Boredom is good for you. The surprising benefits of stultification. The Atlantic. Retrieved on March 2, 2020 from https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2017/…

June 11, 2020

Technology and Screen Time

We are living in a time where there is convenient and simple access to a constant stream of information generated from all over the world that is literally within reach instantly. Scientists who study earthquakes and their effects use data collected from Twitter in addition to standard sensors to help them “identify earthquakes felt by humans” and “trigger an alert typically in under two minutes.” (1)

Doorbell cameras allow people to see and speak to someone who has knocked without ever walking to the door, regardless of where they happen to be at the time. Digitized billboards serve up live-action advertising, but they aren’t just relegated to giant structures we pass by along the side of the road anymore; they’re often in the palm of our hands. Amazing, isn’t it? What’s the common link between them all? Screens and technology.

Believe it or not, smaller tablets have only been around for a decade and smartphones, or rather mobile phones with touch screens, were available beginning in 2007. Today, reaching for a device is now almost automatic. At the same time, there’s growing concern about how these technological marvels are seemingly affecting our every move and interactions, with some people showing signs of struggling to disconnect that are similar to drug and alcohol abuse.

Is technology addiction worthy of panic, or are concerns unfounded? It depends on who you ask. While it’s agreed that our lives are forever changed by the brilliant hand-held computers nearly everyone carries, one researcher argues that “technology addictions generally are symptoms of other, underlying disorders like depression, anxiety, and attention problems.” (2) We’re going to examine the fine line between habits and cause for alarm, look at tools you can use to audit yours and your family member’s relationships with technology, and explore some methods you can use to improve the quality of your interactions. Essentially, it’s about finding the right balance.

Before and after 2010

Apparently, as a species, humans had better concentration, focus, and longer attention spans before 2010. Time Magazine famously published a story in 2015 congratulating readers on being able to make it to the end of a 220-word article. While it would only take about a minute to read, at that time a study purported that people’s attention spans had dropped by four seconds in five years, which was “now…a shorter attention span than a goldfish.” (3) Incidentally, that study also revealed some interesting observations: (4)

People who use screens a lot have a hard time filtering out distractions.
Our attention spans are evolving to become shorter because of the influence of mobile devices and ready Internet access.
Just over ¾ of young adults (18-24) look at their phones when they have nothing to do. By comparison, only 10% of people over age 65 do the same.

Fast forward to 2020, and we’re even more conditioned to stay connected to our screens. Whether it’s because we’re glued to online shopping, or worried that we’d miss out on something important, also known as FOMO (fear of missing out), on average, we check our smartphones every 12 minutes. (5) Still, while devices may not be getting any less expensive, service providers have introduced more flexibility by integrating the cost of the technology with a wider variety of plans to meet people’s needs. Manufacturers also do what they can to ensure people feel they should upgrade their devices frequently. Alarmingly though, it’s created interesting playground conversation where tweens, age 9-12, chatter eagerly anticipating a new rite of passage: the age they will get their first phone – that is, if they don’t have one already.

Screens are here to stay. They’re hard to avoid. In 2019, YouTube shared a startling statistic: more than 500 hours of new content is uploaded each minute. Doing the math, that equates to over 82 years of video each day being consumed on T.V. screens, computers and mobile phones. (6) Live streaming is also on the rise. When you think about it, there’s so much available content that you could do nothing else but watch it and still not catch up.

How much is too much?

Unfortunately, the way screens are so ingrained in our lives is having a significant effect on our physical, mental, and even our financial health. With everything so accessible, delayed gratification has nearly disappeared. You can probably think of someone you know whose screen time has gone past what might be described as a bad habit and is verging on addiction. They may have even expressed their use in those terms. The reality is that when technology usage is starting to interfere with the activities of daily life, it’s a problem.

Similar to drug or alcohol addiction, screen addiction changes brain structure and makes it more difficult for people to remember details, pay attention, participate in planning and prioritize tasks. (7) People can become lost in what they are doing on their devices to the point where they lose sleep, develop unhealthy eating habits, and end up with little to no physical activity in a day. Psychologically, they can be so engrossed in consuming content that they don’t see how damaging it can be. Viewing can trigger anxiety and become a contributing symptom of depression. People can be more vulnerable to harmful or toxic interactions with both people they know and people they aspire to know – like celebrities, or even strangers. Technology addiction can be further broken down into categories such as Internet addiction and Internet gaming disorders. Additionally, persons with technology addiction are more likely to exhibit symptoms of Body Dysmorphia.

While it’s challenging to gauge numbers for adults, the Canadian Pediatric Society has recognized the effect that screen time has on children’s development and mental health. They’ve established screen time guidelines to help parents determine what’s appropriate for children from ages 1 to 19, identifying both benefits and risks of different kinds of content:

For children under two years old, screen time is not recommended.
For children two to five years old, screen time should be limited to less than one hour a day.
For children older than five, they recommend limiting screen time to less than two hours a day.
Teens are better able to cope with the effect of more screen time, but there are also nuances that parents should be aware of.
Teens can be both positively and negatively influenced by social media and can experience deep friendships online, but also be subject to bullying.
Inquisitiveness and relatively easy access to adult-themed content on the Internet often exposes teens to pornography and can create socialization problems related to self-worth, body image, and social interactions.

The general advice encourages parents to distinguish between content that is age and subject appropriate and prioritize academic sites or platforms, enhancing knowledge, literacy or cooperative skills, rather than allow free recreational screen time. Further, the study recognizes that parental and family interaction can affect how well children are able to respond to screen time they receive and that things will continue to evolve based on the child and the popularity of content itself. For school-age children, the recommendations recognize that it may not be realistic to expect no screen time as a response, but instead enforce stricter limits of perhaps one hour per day if parents have cause for concern.

Remember that kids and teens existed before the ages of smartphones and tablets and survived shopping trips and long car rides without tuning into screens: they simply looked around and observed the world around them firsthand.

What’s included when we talk about screen time?

Watching T.V. or movies, working on a computer, using a tablet or smartphone, playing video games through a variety of devices are all contributing to the amount of time we spend interacting with screens. In fact, for many of us, our lives flip seamlessly throughout the day between many screens without us even realizing it.

Awareness is also at the heart of what’s being termed as “secondhand screen time,” where the actions and behaviours demonstrated by parents and caregivers as they use their devices are affecting children and, in turn, influencing their understanding of what normal technology usage is. The problem is that they are observing adult models that aren’t age-appropriate when it comes to what is being accessed and for how long. (8)

Conducting a technology-use audit

Part of the challenge with determining how much screen time is too much and being able to respond with a reduction in usage is that we don’t necessarily have good self-awareness about how much we use this technology each day. We’re also being influenced by manufacturers and developers who are purposefully creating scenarios to increase usage to meet their business objectives. And physiologically, using technology does trigger dopamine to be released, which keeps our brains trained to come back for more. Some companies have recognized that they need to improve awareness around technology usage, and they are demonstrating responsibility with respect to try to help people moderate the use of their products. (9)

Tools such as Apple’s Screen Time and Google are built into the devices that you can use to bring transparency to what your own screen time looks like. There are even ways to apply restrictions to the device or limit access to individual applications within the settings. Seeing these reports can give you a real sense of whether you could call yourself a frequent user or whether your usage is cause for alarm because it is consuming so much of your time each day. It can be shocking to see a breakdown of how much time you spent on your device each day. The reports can show the number of times you’ve picked it up, how many notifications you received that may have alerted you of something, what kinds of activities you completed based on categories such as social media, gaming, productivity, and even health and fitness.

Again, the notion of screen time extends to T.V. viewing too. Keep a log of what you watch on-demand. Streaming services have made it easy to get instant gratification by releasing full seasons of programs all at once. We don’t necessarily need to wait a week to view the next episode of an ongoing story because we can binge watch it.

Once you have had the chance to see how much screen time you accumulate, you can reflect on the repercussions and how the time is affecting your life. You may want to consider responses to questions that allow you to contemplate your relationship with technology and generate some interesting discussions:

How has the amount of time you spend using technology impacted your relationships?
How have your spending habits changed?
In what ways are you using technology as a distraction to avoid dealing with something difficult in your life?
Be honest about whether or not you are still on track to complete milestones for any personal goals you have formally or informally set for yourself.
What kind of physical, emotional, social or financial fulfillment are you getting from your technologically-based activities? Are these healthy?
How does your relationship with technology help you live your best life?
What would you choose to do if you replaced one hour of screen time with any non-technologically related activity?
How would your days be different if you didn’t use technology?
When was the last time you read a book – not on a screen or listening to an audiobook?
What do you like about your use of technology?

Confronting the elephant in the room

Many people aren’t happy with what a technology audit reveals; how all-consuming screens can be and how much

it is affecting their lives or the lives of people they care about. They may discover deeper issues, such as Internet addiction, gaming addiction and social media addiction, or have generalized concerns about how their activities are affecting their physical and mental health. The question of whether technology is fundamentally changing our brain structure is complicated because we see that language and conversation skills, the ability to interact and collaborate with other people, and confidence, can all suffer.

Currently, researchers haven’t found enough evidence to give full support to that theory. It’s more of a case of technology use affecting “cognitive performance.” (10) There’s a bit of irony in the fact that, despite how technology has expanded many people’s worlds, at the same time, it has constricted others’. Many people struggle to interpret non-verbal communications in social settings. Findings reported in many studies, especially concerning the effect on children and teens, are sounding the alarm and warning of the seriousness of what is becoming “a public health issue.” (11)

Nature Canada’s report showed: (12)

87% of pre-school children and 85% of school-aged children do not meet the guidelines for adequate sleep, physical activity and limits on screen time;
Students in grades 7 to 12 are spending up to 7 hours a day on screens, more than three and a half times the recommended limit of 2 hours per day;
Higher durations of screen time were linked with poorer behavioural conduct and lower self-esteem;
Adolescents who spend more time on social media and smartphones are more likely to report mental health issues such as anxiety and depression.

While spending too much time interacting purely through technological means can be detrimental, like anything else, it’s not all bad. There are also some people whose lives have been affected quite positively through the use of technology. They’ve experienced increased confidence and found that they have been able to thrive and have positive and highly gratifying social interactions by joining online communities. We’re not talking about online dating. There are incredibly complex online communities that work out social-political structure, order, and collaboration within gaming communities, for example. While most people would be alarmed at the degree of personal disclosure and trust often seen here, people from all over the world join teams to play within a community that has developed a set of shared beliefs, rules and objectives. It’s also reflected in the use of apps such as “Be My Eyes” which recruits sighted volunteers with visually-impaired people or those who have experienced total vision loss, to help them through smartphones when they are in need.

It could be that they need someone to literally “be their eyes” to find a hat they dropped while working outside or help them see the direction they should be walking, for instance.

How do you change behaviours?

It’s important to understand that any change in behaviour regarding technology use will require conscious and dedicated effort because so much is ingrained in our daily lives. Ultimately, you want to be moving to shift usage to foster desired and healthy interactions.

If you know you will be tempted to look at your device if it is close by while you are working, remove it from the area so that it isn’t easily accessible.
While created as tongue in cheek, you can purchase “jail cells” with a lock and key for your phone to put it away for a while.
When gathered with friends, make a rule that all phones must be face-down in the centre of the table so everyone can focus on enjoying social interactions.
If you attend concerts or other live performances or events, make a point of experiencing them firsthand, not through a screen while you try to make a recording.
Finally, allow yourself to be bored and do nothing for a while: it’s healthy for your mind.
If you are worried about addictive behaviours, seek professional help.
Create device/screen free activities with friends, family or peers such as any outdoor activities, board or card games, sports or even conversation or debate.

References

@Elaine, (2015, October 7). How the USGS uses Twitter data to track earthquakes. [Blog} Twitter. Retrieved February 14, 2020 from https://blog.twitter.com/en_us/a/2015/usgs-twitter…
Ferguson, Christopher J., (2018, May 23). A psychologist explains why technology’s impact on your brain is probably overblown. Quartz at Work. Retrieved, January 27, 2020 from https://qz.com/work/1285458/technology-addiction-a…
McSpadden, Kevin., (2015, May 14). You Now Have a Shorter Attention Span Than A Goldfish. Time Magazine. Retrieved on February 14, 2020 from https://time.com/3858309/attention-spans-goldfish/
McSpadden, Kevin., (2015, May 14). You Now Have a Shorter Attention Span Than A Goldfish. Time Magazine. Retrieved on February 14, 2020 from https://time.com/3858309/attention-spans-goldfish/
TimeToLogOff (n.d.). The Facts On Our Digital And Internet Addiction and the need for Digital Detox. TimeToLogOff. https://www.itstimetologoff.com/digital-detox-fact…
Hale, James. (2019, May 7). More than 500 hours of content are now being uploaded to YouTube every minute. Tubefilter. Retrieved on February 14, 2020 from https://www.tubefilter.com/2019/05/07/number-hours…
Gregory, Christina., PhD. (n.d.) Internet Addiction Disorder. Psycom. Retrieved on February 14, 2020 from https://www.psycom.net/iadcriteria.html
Renstrom, Joelle, (2020, February 2). Is secondhand screen time the new secondhand smoking? The Herald-Dispatch. Retrieved February 14, 2020 from https://www.herald-dispatch.com/_zapp/is-secondhan…
Nandi, Anisha, Patterson, Dan. (2018, December 19). Addicted to your smartphone? How to keep track of your screen time. CBS News. Retrieved February 14, 2020 from https://www.cbsnews.com/news/apple-screen-time-goo…
Pasquinelli, Elena. (2018, September 11). Are digital devices altering our brains? Scientific American. Retrieved on February 14, 2020 from https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/are-dig…
Nature Canada (n.d.). Screen Time vs Green Time. Nature Canada. Retrieved on February 14, 2020 from https://naturecanada.ca/enjoy-nature/for-children/…
Nature Canada (n.d.). Screen Time vs Green Time. Nature Canada. Retrieved on February 14, 2020 from https://naturecanada.ca/enjoy-nature/for-children/…

May 11, 2020